So I've made it to post-op day five with a heavy weight on my shoulders. Apparently, it's just the increasing platepus duck lips on my face, so we're still in business. I figure as long as I can walk to the bathroom and milk this special treatment from Mike, I might as well stick out this process without going back to Dr. Miller and begging him to just cut my head off and give me a new one. While the swelling HAS gone down (a very small amount), I have developed a lucious shade of yellow/green blush on my face. Obviously, Cover Girl's shade of baby food pea green blusher is NOT a hit. I'm the poster child for all REJECTED cosmetics here lately.
I made a list of my favorite FAILED products:
New Fragrance: HOSPITAL. Fail.
New Concealer: Inflatable 24 Hour Stay-on powder. "We'll distract your zits by blowing up your face 3x it's actual size". Fail.
New Lip gloss: "Crusty Peely" for enhanced texture. Fail.
New Self-Tanner shade: Elmer's Glue. Fail.
Now that I've vented about my otherwise unattractive portrait, I will tell you that I was reunited with a long lost VERY BEST FRIEND today! Bojangles Sweet Iced Tea. It was like wattered-down heaven in a crappy fast food cup. Made my day though. The straw-eating has improved greatly. Still bothers me after about 30 minutes of trying to eat. I've been "eating" in about an hour here lately. It really takes effort to work these lazy jaw muscles. Mammaw made homemade potato soup and it tasted scrumptious, however, it was too thick to get through my trusty syringe/straw so I have to save it for later in the week. For now, it's still Ensure, Dannon Kid's yogurt, and amoxicillan. Then I go to the bathroom. Take a rest. And do it all over again. So greatful for not wanting any pain meds. That's been a miracle for the girl who hyperventilated over an IV BEFORE they sawed her jaw into.
Got a really cool gift basket today too! I'm going to win the World record for crosswords/word searches by the time this process is over. At least it keeps my brain from turning to mush from watching too much Tom & Jerry. Hopefully tomorrow I'll be able to dress appropriately and walk around outside for longer than 5 minutes. I've been noticing how weak my hands are so I definitely need to jump on the bandwagon and step up my exercise program--or lack thereof. Hopefully I'll be able to overcome my insomnia tonight. Been having difficulty sleeping upright when I'm normally a side squeezer (fetal position while holding a pillow). Wish me sweet dreams and I'll continue this adventure tomorrow!!! Hang in there with me. I'll keep you posted!
Sorry the soup didn't work out for you. At least you have something to look forward to later in the week. Hope you got some sleep last night. Talk to you later today. Love ya.
ReplyDeleteI am sorry that you haven't been sleeping well, but I have really enjoyed reading your blogs. Especially this one.....love the failed/ rejected cosmetics list. While you may look different, you are still the funny, creative girl that you have always been. Looking forward to visiting with you tomorrow! Hope you get some rest!
ReplyDeleteLove ya!
Hi Kristin! Are you ready for a visit from me and Parrish children tomorrow? We have been waiting patiently and trying to give you some time, but I bet you are ready to break the monotony. We won't stay long if you are up for it, but truly understand if you are not. Let me know! Wishing you a restful and speedy recovery.
ReplyDeleteStephanie--I sooo enjoyed our visit today! Makes time go by MUCH faster when you have something to look forward too!! Love ya!
ReplyDeleteLiz--Since Vayda saw me at my worst on Saturday night and we managed to just sit and look at each other and giggle, I think I'm ready to take on the full clan! It will give me a reason to get "pretty" in the morning!! See you then! :)